They want to live in the comfort zone, but that's just not for me. I don't ever want to think: 'I wish I'd done that.' I'm not interested in stagnating."In an ideal world, I'd meet someone who also wanted to do all those things, but realistically I think it's unlikely. I don't think I'll ever want to have children, because you can't be really independent then. Children are a lifelong responsibility, and I'm quite a risk-taker I believe in getting as much experience of life as I can. I'm off to Thailand next month, and a girlfriend and I are going skydiving after that. A lot of the men seem to want the girls to stay at home, playing the supportive wife. Even if they don't give up work, the woman's career almost always ends up coming second, especially when children arrive.
I get so bored I sit there and imagine my head exploding."I do think young men want to settle down more than women these days. Or if I want to stay out dancing in clubs all night, I can - and frequently do."I meet plenty of eligible guys, working in the City. Mostly, they're the settling-down type: steady, reliable and responsible, and looking for a nice girlfriend But it leaves me cold I'm frightened even to go out to dinner with them. It's a bit selfish, but it's the way I want to be."If you have kids or a partner, you can't focus 100 per cent on your self-development and career. Now, if I want to go to bed at 9pm three nights in a row, I can. If I want to blow £500 in a beauty salon, or change jobs suddenly, it's my choice No one else has to agree. I earn good money - around £70,000 a year - and I enjoy the fact that no one else has a say in how it's spent.
I loved the idea of doing what I wanted to do, when I wanted to do it."Now I work hard and play hard. The glamour of working and being independent really appealed to me. And that is why, reader, I am happy to announce that, now in my 40s, I am finally a reformed commitmentphobe. What cured me? My worst fears not being realised, and my realisation of how much I loved him.
